I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Did you pee in the oven last night??
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
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