JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
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