who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
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