Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
You may now shotgun with the bride
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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