nut hugger
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Randomize
