That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
