I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Randomize
