Kiss
Puke
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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