ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Randomize
