oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Randomize
