I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Randomize
