Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize
