Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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