he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
