Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
