New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
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