it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
