Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
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