Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
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