She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize