somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
