He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
