i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
