I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
