I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
