found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Randomize
