She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Randomize
