Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Randomize