this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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