i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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