I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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