i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
