doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize
