i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
