trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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