She went from zero to smokin in five shots
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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