Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
