yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Barsexuality is the new black.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
