idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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