Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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