i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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