i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
