stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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