I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
