AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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