If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Drake has all the answers
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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