just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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