can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Randomize
