We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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