If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Randomize
