actually, I'm a sock model
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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